When we found out we were expecting baby number three, one of the questions for Tom and I was whether this would be the hardest adjustment in terms of adding children to our family. Everyone seems to have a different opinion about which transition is most difficult: whether it's the initial adjustment of welcoming your first child and becoming parents for the first time, or having your second baby and learning to juggle the responsibilities of two children, or when you have your third child and the parents are outnumbered by the children. (And I don't even want to think about how challenging it must be to have twins or triplets!) But we had been warned that the third addition could be particularly challenging, so we braced ourselves for the worst!
With Isaac nearing the two-month mark, I think I can safely say that bringing Millie home and encountering motherhood for the first time is still one of the hardest things I've done as a parent. It has a lot to do with the circumstances we faced during the first few months of her life, and the fact that Millie has an intense personality which was evident even when she was a baby. Tom and I both agree that the first month of Millie's life was the hardest month of our marriage, and as I reflect on it now, I think it's a story I'll share sometime soon in another post.
That's not to say that having a second and a third baby haven't provided challenges. I do remember once Silas was born I felt like I had gone from having a little bit of time to myself to having absolutely no time to myself. And now with Isaac I'm just feeling like the amount of work and chaos have increased. But both transitions have been manageable, and not what I would call intensely overwhelming.
When I focus on the positive, I realize that Tom and I are both growing and maturing as parents. We are learning to be more flexible and less selfish, and our children are our teachers. And honestly, what I notice most about this increase in the number of children is that I feel increasingly thankful and blessed by their presence in our lives. I feel like I'm seeing more clearly the brevity of babyhood and childhood, and what an honor and a joy it is to be a mother. I am happy to be outnumbered.
